My Phone Battery Has Trust Issues

My Phone Battery Has Trust Issues

My phone battery and I are no longer on speaking terms.

This morning it was at 100%. I opened Instagram for “two minutes.” When I looked again it was at 17% and giving me the silent treatment.

The Intervention

I tried everything:

  • Low Power Mode (it took it as an insult)
  • Closing background apps (it opened more out of spite)
  • Promising I would charge it soon (it has heard this before)

Now it only charges when it feels like it, and it deliberately dies during important calls. Therapists say this is a classic case of battery abandonment issues.

We’re trying couples counseling. So far the only progress is that it agreed to stay above 5% if I stop taking photos of my food.

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